marley bone coach

POINT-OUT

Co takhle projednou překvapit písemným testem na znalosti z probíraných textů? Zde je pár námětů. Pokud vezmete za své všechny, můžete dát test pro dvě různé skupiny, aby se nedalo příliš snadno opisovat. Nebo dát dva různé testy. Je víceméně jedno jestli budete věty číst nahlas a studenti budou mít akorát tak čas na překlad (bez zapsání českého originálu) nebo jestli jim české věty rozdáte.

» ta holka z předchozího večera
» proč se teď všichni žení?
» je to moje chyba, já jsem to podělal
» přestože jste mi až dosud byli věrní
» hledáte něco konkrétního?
» ty jsi o mě řekl, že jsem ubožák, že?
———————
» tady to začíná žít tak kolem deváté
» komu se směješ?
» pokud na ni budeš dál zírat, zčervená
» nespěchej, řekni mi, až to bude hotové
» jediné co děláte je, že žvaníte o blbostech
» jak dlouho ho už takhle provokujete?

KEY
» the girl from the night before
» why is everyone getting married?
» it’s my fault, I screwed up … I’m (the one) to blame
» even though you’ve been faithful to me until now … although, so far
» are you looking for anything (in) particular?
» you called me pathetic, didn’t you?
———————
» this place starts getting busy at about nine … gets pretty busy
» who are you laughing at?
» if you keep staring at her, she’ll turn red
» take your time, tell me when it’s done … there’s no rush, finished
» all you do is bullshit
» how long have you been teasing him like this?

INQUIRY QUE / FOLLOW-UPS

a) how can you screw up your life?
(if no reply) can you do it by getting married?

b) why did the other guys call me pathetic?
what did I say that made them think I as a loser?

c) does god reward people who are faithful to him?
does he do it promptly or does he take his time?

A.T. IDEAS / SPIN-OFF

monolog by / interview with

a) the guy in the tattoo shop (Mike)
b) one of the artists (live *)
c) the guy who screwed up his life
d) the Lord (from saying grace)

* takhle by mohl vypadat live reporting z tetovacího salónu. Jeden z umělců je na mobilu a mluví se svou přítelkyní:

Hey Laura, I’m sitting in mike’s shop…
Is Mike the guy with the tattoo on his shoulder?
Yeah, he actually runs this tattoo place.
I see. Who else is there?
Just a couple of friends, painters mostly.
What about the guy that you told me about the other day?
What guy?
The one who screwed up his life.
Oh, he’s not here. He doesn’t come here anymore.
Oh. So is it crowded? I can’t hear any voices.
No, it’s a bit of a slow day… Wait, a girl just came in.
Do you know her?
No, she’s just walking around, she keeps looking at Mike. Wait a minute, this must be the girl he was just telling us about. Apparently, she came in here yesterday and Mike couldn’t take his eyes off her. She looks kind of homely, though. I wonder what Mike sees in her. Well, I guess his taste is different from mine.
Oh, you think I’m pretty?
You bet, honey. Anyway, Mike has just stood up and walked over to her. You know what? Why don’t I call you when this is over and I’ll tell you what exactly happened.
Alright, but be quick. I may not be a cat but I’m not too good at coping with curiosity, either.

——————

conversation between

a) the Lord and Homer Simpson (from saying grace)
do I hear you complain, Homer? — you bet, lord. — what seems to be the trouble? — well, I’m kind of angry with you. — for what? What have I done that upsets you? — well, for one thing, you never let me have anything fancy to eat. — true. but what have you done to deserve a fancy meal? — well, for one thing, I’ve been praying a lot. — Homer, I’m sick of people praying. I tune out when they do that. it’s a complete waste of time. — so what do I have to do to make you love me, Lord?

b) the girl (Naomi) and Mike

c) the guy who screwed up his life and his artist friends

FOOD FOR THOUGHT

how stuff works: tattooing (point, history, technique, who)
I have absolutely no idea how tattooing started. I have no interest in finding out and I sure as hell don’t want to get a tattoo myself. Not because it hurts. If I want something really badly, I’ll get it even if it hurts bad. But why should I have a tattoo? What am I trying to say by getting one? Does it say I’m a mean bad-ass and you’d better watch out ‘cos I may feel like kicking your ass one of these days? I don’t think so. If you ask me, a tattoo says: I’m such an incredibly uninteresting person that the only way I can draw other people’s attention is by having a tattoo and showing it off no matter how disgusted they are by it and how sincerely they don’t give a shit

what would you do: tell the story of someone you know or have heard of who stupidly ruined his/her life

devil’s advocate: there is a god and he is right to make people suffer

DUMBED DOWN

Je velmi pravděpodobné, že většina studentů obsah druhé vignette převypráví zhruba následujícím stylem

I went to the shop and I saw some artists and they were bullshitting and I saw the guy and he said “if you will be my girlfriend, I will give you a free tattoo.” All the guys laughed but he said “Really, marry me.” Ii said “I don’t know, maybe I will never marry” and one guy said I was smart because some other guy, their friend, married very quickly and screwed up his life.

a popře tak celý smysl našeho snažení. To nejmenší co můžeme udělat je, že těmto studentům své znechucení dáme najevo. Výše uvedené převyprávění je totiž za nula bodů. Není v něm sice žádná hrubá chyba, není v něm ale ani jedno spojení, které by student před uvedením tohoto textu neznal, ba předpokládám, že v něm není jediné spojení, jež by student gymnázia neznal před nástupem na tento ústav.

——————

Pokud nějaký student převypráví text stejně ubohým způsobem, ale za použití slov bullshit a screw up, je to za jeden bod z deseti možných, a to s přimhouřením obou očí. Určitě to není cíl, ke kterému se upínám: kombinace primitivních větných struktur a okrajové slovní zásoby mě jako učitele nenadchne a studentům to také dávám najevo. Nejvíce si u tohoto konkrétního textu budu cenit snažení studenta, který použije tato spojení:

get busy
particular
had been staring
called him pathetic
had gotten married
teasing
a girl he barely knew (z easy verze)

Proč? Protože ty lze nejsnáze nahradit jednoduchými alternativami

before more people came
anything special
was looking
said he was
married
some girl who he didn’t know very well

nebo přímo vypustit. Pokud se student rozhodne je neobejít a bude se snažit o hodnotný projev, zaslouží si to uznání